Managing Holiday Stress

By Amy Scott, LCSW, CADC for Mind & Body

It’s the holiday season!  The decorations are going up, the gifts are being purchased and people are preparing for family gatherings.  But for many, the holidays bring additional stress and responsibilities.  Most people already have busy lives so how do you fit in these extra tasks and still enjoy your holiday celebrations?  Here are some things to think about as you are planning for your holidays.

(1) Simplify! Talk with your family and friends and identify what are the most important holiday traditions to continue. Examples may be; instead of cooking all of Grandma’s recipes, you choose your favorite to prepare. Buy prepared side dishes or desserts instead of making everything from scratch.  Make only 1 or 2 types of cookies or participate in a cookie exchange to save time. Have everyone bring a side dish or dessert.
You can also make changes in gift giving to make the holiday shopping easier and less expensive.   Set a budget for each person on your list and stick to it.   Draw names or play Dirty Santa. For the past two years, my sister has asked people to donate to a charity in lieu of buying her a gift. Many families play games with prizes instead of buying gifts. This is a great way to have fun with your family.

(2) Practice good self-care! Make sure that you continue your exercise routine or take a break to take a walk, get a massage or attend a yoga class. Drink plenty of water; keep a bottle of water in your car or your bag so it is always handy. Staying hydrated will make you feel better. Make time to be around the people you enjoy. Family gatherings can be stressful and even unpleasant for some so its important to sprinkle in a holiday movie or dinner out with friends.  

Avoid drinking too much alcohol. Alcohol is a depressant and drinking to much can result in impaired decision making and over-eating. Don’t restrict yourself from eating the holiday foods you enjoy but do so in moderation. Don’t skip meals in preparation for holiday parties as this can cause you to overeat. Eat a nutritious meal or snack before attending holiday events. Make time to rest in between activities and ensure that you are getting enough sleep. 

If you are religious, focus on appreciating the reason for the season.  Attend a church service or Christmas concert or program. Make it a daily practice to identify something that you are grateful for.

(3) Acknowledge and validate your own feelings! The holidays may be a reminder of the death of a loved one, a broken relationship or even childhood abuse. You are not obligated to do anything that you do not want to. Stay home if that is best for you. Order pizza if that is easier. Cut your visits short if you need to. Share with people who care about you, how you are feeling. You do not have to put on a mask of holiday cheer. Your feelings of sadness and loneliness do not go away just because it is the holiday season. Practice self-compassion and prioritize your own needs. Do not choose to feel guilty; you have done nothing wrong by saying no. Seek the help of a therapist if you are feeling depressed or need professional help setting boundaries.  

(4) Do something different! Take a vacation during the holidays. Many family’s take trips instead of buying gifts. Volunteer to cook a meal or serve at a soup kitchen or homeless shelter. Buy Christmas presents for a family who cannot afford them this year.

Respond to others with kindness and gratitude. For example, instead of stewing about how long the grocery line is; take a moment to appreciate the ease and convenience of obtaining food in our country. Smile and send a positive thought or prayer to those who are angry or sad. Hold the door open for a stranger. Pay for the coffee or meal of the person behind you in the drive thru. Remember, the holidays are what you make them! So, try these strategies to make them less stressful.

Check out the free resources available at Healthymind.crediblemind.com.

Amy Scott is a Licensed Clinical Social Worker and Certified Alcohol and Drug Counselor who works with adolescents, couples, families and adults.